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How to get unstuck from negative thoughts OR remembering the good stuff!

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Are you a glass half full or a glass half empty person? Do your thoughts tend to be more negative or positive?
 
I like to think that I am a positive up-beat gal for sure and definitely like my wine glass, milk glass, all my glasses half full 😉
 
But if I have a bad day, I know that it can be difficult to stop thinking about those turn of events that have left me reeling. I might ring a friend to vent to her, complain to my husband or just struggle to stop thinking about it. And as I have mentioned on The Sista Code before, when something great happens to me I don’t often share or talk about it – I don’t allow myself just to enjoy celebrating my wins – which is just crazy!
 
But according to Alison Ledgerwood and her research, I am not alone. In fact, it has been clinically proven that it’s harder for all of us to see the upside of any negative occurrence and get past it. The good news is, it is something we can change! It just takes a little effort.
 
Alison is an Associate Professor of Social Psychology at the University of California and spends her days trying to figure out how people think; how you can think better; and how to harness that knowledge to potentially improve the social world in which we all live.
 
In her TEDx talk (below), Alison discusses how we all have a tendency to focus on negative thoughts and crappy things that happen to us, and far less on the positive – all the great stuff!
 
People can then become ‘stuck’ in the negative, especially when we continue talking about negative things that annoy us, venting to friends, partners and colleagues thinking that if we do that it will make us feel better.
 
It won’t.
 
The key really is to be aware: be aware when you start having those negative thoughts and conversations and stop yourself. Then consciously change your thoughts. Stop talking on and on about the bad day you have had and consciously think about something good that you saw or experienced!
 
And celebrate your successes and your wins. You will feel amazing, but even better you may be inspiring someone else!
 
Enjoy Alison’s TEDx talk!
 
…Oh and start thinking and talking about the good stuff!
 
Mel xx
 
 

Melissa Histon

Photographer, philanthropist, adventurer, blogger, avid permitter and social changer, Melissa Histon is a woman on a mission to make a real difference to the lives of women globally. Melissa spent 10 years working in the corporate world before leaving to establish a successful photography business. After experiencing a number of life-altering events, Melissa created The Sista Code in May 2014 with a dream to see women empowered, happy and connected. Whether it's building a house for the homeless in Nepal, interviewing inspiring women from around the globe, or creating events and campaigns to support sistas escaping domestic violence, Melissa knows that true change can only happen when we all stand together and boost each other.

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